Skip to main content

Posts

Showing posts from June, 2011

HIS Assurance

I know I’ll be fine. Allow me to cry on your shoulder and whisper to you all my adversities. Wrap me around your arms and assure me that I’ll be fine. I know I’ll be fine. Remind me of your sufferings so that all my sufferings may become a sharing to yours. I know I am not alone. I’ll be fine. I know I’ll be fine. The load is heavy; the yoke is hard. You’ll make it alright. I’ll be fine. I know I’ll be fine. Your love I can’t understand. Your ways are not like mine. I’ll tread your way. Your love will be my guide and stronghold. I’ll be fine. I know I’ll be fine. I may lose you in my sight because of my infidelity to your love. But, from your love I can never hide. I can never run from your love. I’ll be fine. I know I’ll be fine.

The Voice

I was in a room shrouded by darkness. I was in turmoil, in great panic. I was looking for the light—a symbol of liberty from the most depressing shadows of sinfulness. I sat down and gazed at the shapeless dusk around me. Then, I found light—an opening—myriads of them! I ran toward them one by one. And one by one, I got tired. I discovered little holes that would never fit me to get out. I lied down and tried to become one with the lifeless cloister. I was in slumber when I heard a voice. I heard my name. The voice was calling me. I cried and hoped. The rescue had come! I expressed my presence. I stood up and prepared myself for an astounding and grandeur gateway. I waited for no one. I got tired and disappointed. Throughout, the voice amplified and did not stop. I ignored it to avoid further frustrations. From a dark and shapeless room, I saw a dark and shapeless future. And so time passed by, opportunity swept away. I became deaf to a call. I stagnated and fell to an endless a

Ing Tutu na N'yan...(The Truth of the Matter...)

We all have our own circle of friends back home. We all have our own cherished moments with them which perhaps give us the confidence to say, “I can lose as many friends as I can here” Or maybe, we planted in our minds and hearts that all we are here for is solely to work and not to befriend or be a friend. How far will these principles bring us? Or how close will they draw us to being “truly” true to ourselves? I don’t know whether what I would further say will blow your top or not. But since being true is what you want I’ll give you a mild dose of it. And I hope this’ll tranquilize you. There’s a very thin line which separates being true from being immature. It is such a valued discipline to be able to master one’s emotions, that is; to be able to stay aware of what is happening inside or outside of you and then be over and above. I feel edgy to your reaction. And I really feel like punching your mouth. If I do so, do I satisfy your definition of truthfulness? And what if I d

Deeply

It is rugged thinking of you not just now but over and over.When we are talking on the phone, it is an indication that we can never get warm enough but I just love the overwhelming feeling when I get some vacation days to spend with you. Your mere presence is comfort to me and your humor just drenches every moment with joy and jubilance until the point where we must say goodbye. True! We are bigger than these and though it is laborious at times, I know we will figure out until our 'someday' comes.I wish we abide to enjoy every angle of each other in any way we can. I can not wait to hug you tight and kiss you with amplified love and affection. Thank you for sharing this wonderful life with me. I could not see myself longing for anyone else the way I am missing you. I love you - DEEP! Due credit to she who wrote this for me.

The Rising

I remember it so well-- in my early years to attempt to walk and run; and in my first time to stumble and realize the pain of bruised knees and hands— but I still don’t understand why I never cried until I saw my mom coming to get me.  Some four years ago I vowed that for each fall I make I should see myself with a bold heart rising. I thought that I have been thru all the most depressing and enduring turbulences in life. I thought that all looming problems are manageable and that any possible pains are bearable. Now, I feel drooping—as I have never felt before. After making innumerable scapegoats, as I have run out of subjects and objects for my faultfinding-- I no longer know what to do. Where does my way of life lead to? I always knew I can make it. I always believed that every dream is at hand. There was no impossible dream for me because I believed so much in myself. I assumed I was strong and wise—almost infallible. Yet I was nothing but arrogant and stubborn. Once in

The Maestro

This is arranged to be a poem with counts & rhymes. Yet with risk to freeze the notes in gestures like mimes. Ah, why not write the lines in free-verse instead; And make the message more freely spread? We’re thinking of Manny & his music combined; And what common tones they have in line. We wish to write about his tempo in life: An allegro or adagio or his chosen style. His music is in-tune with his ideas applied, Beginning at dawn until the end at night. Notice in the morning while all rush for work To Ras Laffan where it’s clouded with smoke. Though this grazioso moves with grace intact He’d finish in time when Kuya Nap has come. He is our legato who dictates smooth sound That we too can play life and care less to rush. He can sing in solo, in duet and chorus. In harmony with people with whom he’d choose. Let’s learn from this maestro & his music of hint. How life is better played in a natural beat. At night his cadence promises not an end

The BIG Thing

Let’s talk about BIG things! The feature which is most obvoius with Cef are his BIG eyeswhich can see the BIG and tiny things a friend does… I’ll speak for myself and for my noise-partner G2... G1 and G2 have been this big-eyed gentleman’s constant burden for the past months (and will still be in the coming days). Our noise, annoyance and troubles have added weight to his works and personal burdens. We knew it so well that oftentimes we caused him to blow his top… and consequently almost blew up our faces… he he he he! His BIG voice Now that is real speech power! “The word of the word” “Iz et? …are just two of the signatures of this young Dan Rather. Really… it’s like watching “CBS main news” live right in front of you every time you hear him speak… But, to G1 & G2 it’s more than the modulation and volume of his voice—it’s about giving his best in everything he does… Besides, that BIG voice is the very same voice that speaks for us to advocate our welfare. Sounds

Paglalayag

Friendship is a like a vessel drifted in the ocean. You plan for your port or your island to dock.. You also plan when… You also plan how… But the wind has its own will. And the waves, their own control. Perhaps, it was on your plan to meet us or maybe not… Perhaps the wind and the waves just agreed with your designed journey but then again, maybe not. Or perhaps they just tossed you to our life without you have ever planned for it. But anyhow—whether tossed, planned, blown, or whatever—we are glad that you landed to our life. given to Juan Carlos Francisco in Saudi Villa on his 26th birthday

Transformers

This may be untimely catchy as a title. But just like a harvest, today is this article’s due season. It matured nothing because of popularity. I haven’t watched “Transformers” in the wide screen but I was an addict viewer of its animated series when I was a kid. It is untimely but somewhat relevant, so to say, because like in the movie a “transformer” in me also happened in Qatar. It doesn’t appear as easy when Optimus Prime commands, “Autobots, transform!” and every one in his team follows. But the challenge may be in some ways similar. Because in the compelling voice of their leader implies an approaching engagement to a great battle. Nobody would be exempted in the battle— not Bumble Bee and Jazz who expressed that they are not warriors like the Deceptecons. It’s frightening to follow but it’s securing to give up one’s fear for a noble reason and with a leader that stands by your side. Transforming pre-requires the frequently unwanted process of deforming. Transformin

The Gift

"I am leaving you with a gift--peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give isn't like the peace the world gives. So don't be troubled or afraid."    John 14:27 It was her birthday. And the usual question a friend would ask was posted, “what do you want to receive on your birthday?” “Peace of mind”, she answered unequivocally. I literally checked my pocket to look for the gift she wished to have. I even checked my wallet if I had enough money to buy for the one she was begging to take. None in my pocket; not enough money in my wallet—for the gift she was dying to receive wasn’t in me and in my little capacity to achieve. Indeed, no one can give something he doesn’t have. I thought that if i didn't have it, perhaps other people possess the one my beloved was looking for. And by asking maybe, in the process, I might as well have it too. As such, I looked for people who, in my opinion, bear the face of tranquility and happiness. I handed them the questions f

ABRO_D

(dahil laging may kulang sa abroad) (because something is always missing abroad) I still have 30 minutes before I go back to my pad. I don’t want to overlook this chance. I will write. I will allow my soul to breathe for awhile. I have been in the desert for 2 years now. The sands are motes which have gotten into my eyes. I’ve lost good vision and my focus. The things that happened to me are as many as the grains of sand in the desert. They are just too many and sometimes too much to handle. Let me look back two years ago. What were there? In my plans; in my dreams… I left my homeland with copious dreams to improve my life and the lives of my loved ones. I came into this land in short of everything but my love and dreams for my family. I thought those were enough.. I anticipated the hardships but failed to foresee all its consequences. I said I will endure but never said that my heart is unbreakable. I claimed that I will be brave but not that I will not shed tears. I

My Mom and Best Friend

Behind every man’s success is a woman… before that same man is also that same woman who shields the man from imminent adversaries. That man is the child and that woman is the mother who steps in advance to guard against the looming danger and then sits down behind him to become one of the audiences to applaud. The woman; the mother. The man; the child. I want to be the husband and father that my wife and children will be proud of. I want to be the best husband to my wife-to-be and; be the best dad to my children-to-be. It's a tough goal but I gear to be the perfect contrast of my father. When I was very young I described a family as comprised by lola, tito, tita, pinsan, ate and nanay. But when I began to attend to school and as I memorized to sing and recite nursery rhymes about family I discovered a slight difference from what I used to believe about. I was confused. But I did not mind. "Who is your father?"-- I finished my grade one as first in the honor l

How old are you?

Kumusta? I have been thinking how to reconcile with reality my earnest dream to be a part of all the years of your life… Why didn’t our lives meet earlier? Besides height I ran short of years as well. I won’t mention the number of years that you are advanced baka kasi mapunit ang sulat na ito na hindi mo man lamang nababasa ng buo.My point here is not about your age although it’s one of those that I admire about you. My point here is—Where was I during the times when you wanted to share and celebrate life’s goodness? Or what was I busy with that I wasn’t able to give you even a slight comfort during the instances you felt that life was unfair? ‘di ko alam kung may mararating pa itong ginagawa ko pagkatapos kong magpahiwatig ng kawalang-katinuan at i-punto pa ang iyong edad… Absurd it may be. Absurd I admit. Because absurd it is on its own basis-- a poor prince falling in love with a beautiful princess. Hayan na naman ako showing some self-pity… pero sa tingin ko, mas tunay na wala sa k

Thank God It's Saturday!

It’s Saturday and it’s my favorite day in the Philippines. Firstly, because it’s when weekend that the 'work-end' officially starts. Secondly, ah no more second… it’s all there with the first. Corniche Doha, Qatar The week ends, the fun begins. It’s my time for my bike, for a real sound siesta, a stroll around the villa, a DVD marathon, a family dinner together… oh, nostalgia is in the air. And it’s coming to get me… But I’ll get it even before it gets me… What about my Saturday Qatar version? Let’s begin:  resting time foiled by an early morning wake-up, a rush in the bathroom, a snatch of a swift breakfast, a 20-minute trip to workplace. And then, voila! The reality is right in my face… Reality, paper works, files, bills, inputs, encodes, complaints, bosses, (some)officemates, desk, and phone calls are inter-changeable terms in this write-up. Here on Saturday, the week has just started; the desk has just started to be piled up with assorted papers; and the CPU has jus

Ima (Mother)

I’ve kept on wondering what else my mother cannot do. I have asked this because I was raised by she whom I perceive to be the most powerful among all of God’s creatures. I should add: when I was very young I never admired superman, the president, my teacher, ‘wok with Yan’, ms. universe, the pope, etc. in their respective aspects as much as I admired her. She is a human par excellence.  Yet slowly I noticed that even a super-human grows old and gets sick & weak. I had denied these to myself. But with obvious changes like her hair fading to gray & white, her age 61 this year, her health no longer as good as before and her memory slightly fading, I should accept that she, too, has limitations. But where did my mom’s superpowers go?  Flashback-- we did not have our TV until I was 12. But our mom managed to buy a radio which was enough to muster the three of us together especially in the evening listening to Beinte Quatro Oras, Si Mata, Gabi ng Lagim, Tiya Dely , etc. B

Thank you

Did I say I shall thank you?  For the longest time I have never been set into my good old writing mood. Thank you. …because you have stirred up my inert passion to write. I've found myself wanting to breathe life to words and phrases again. Work has been so frustrating but not so much when your face is in my mind. Thank you …because you inspire me despite the hassles at work. In my first few months I struggled with homesickness.  Thank you …because you taught me that being happy isn’t far-fetched. During the times when I thought I was staring at nothing. Thank you …because daydreaming is now a beautiful thing to do. Thank you very much.

The Thinker

I have thought of you today like I did yesterday, two days ago, a week ago, a month ago, a year ago… I have thought of you today like I did on the days that passed in my life with you.   But I am thinking of you today in a lot more special way. All thoughts have accumulated that every day I become more and more overwhelmed by happy anticipation. I am thinking of you today like I am collecting memories that I will keep as treasures in my life. I am thinking that everything shall pass away but not the memories of us. I am thinking of 21st October when you said yes to my question, "will you be my girlfriend?"… To me, then, that was a pre-nuptial “I-do” or a pre-engagement question, “will you marry me?” I am thinking of all the three vacations in the Philippines spent with you. And yes, I am thinking of them in details.   I am thinking of you and us and I am thinking of our tomorrow and how it would be. I love you.

Next Page

Have you ever read a book wherein you skipped pages or took a peek of the ending to see how the story is going to be? I am guilty. And my punishment? I ended up disappointed by losing the thrill and the real essence of why I was reading a book. I wasted time and energy. Admittedly, many times I wished I could see how my relationship with my girlfriend is going to be. Well I attempted to guess, like dominoes, in my mind how our life together will become. I failed because frequently, if not always, there have emerged unexpected trials and good turns. I have had positive and negative thoughts which looked unrealistic. I oftentimes chose not to believe because they are either too good or too bad. But they are all true and they exist right in my face.  Our story was published making it almost fully unrestricted which is contrary to how we wanted it to be. It may have become an open book to many. But then still, we have chosen only a few friends— close and tough ones- who to share with our

Our Book

We have just completed another year last October.  That’s a total of 2 in our book. Such a span is too short for those who have already reached long years in their relationship but definitely not deemed a statistic to those who yearn for forever. I am not sure how many more years, months, weeks, days, hours, minutes or seconds are waiting. But I do know that it has been really tough for us.   The main duty I've assumed is to make our life better and happy. However it has remained a presumption until this time. I am sorry. I have been wishing to tell you never to lose the book and to keep every page intact but who am I to say so? The pages on it, even the gloomy ones, are very important to us, more so to me. I cannot change the settings or give you back time... and I really don’t want to. They have been a very important learning tool.   Will I be perfect? Oh I hope so. But I know I won’t be.   Love is a great blessing not many people find. I am glad I found mine and I w

Lost

Perhaps I was lost. But it was in this way that I’ve found you. And if I were to be lost again and again just to find you again and again, I would love to live with that cycle.