Hi, Babylove.
In a few days from now you’ll be 5 years old. I don’t know if you are
now able to read and understand messages such as this. I don’t know and that’s my
fault. I know where to go to personally see how you are doing. I’m sorry If I choose to keep things this way--because this is the best way that I can love you for now.
This way you have peace of mind. This way you are out of
trouble. This way you don’t have to choose. This way the only wrong is me—none
about you nor with the rest of the people you love.
It has never been this saddest. This sadness cannot be
compared to any degree of emptiness, loss and pain. But I have to take this and
believe in God.
Heaven knows I’ll trade the remainder of my life today just
to see you in a minute that doesn’t cause you confusion and pain. Although apparently things are not yet ok, everything is being re-aligned by God. Slowly yet lovingly
everything’s gonna be alright. Someday,
I’m going to see and hug you tight and tell you with all of my heart:
It's all worth it, anak.
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